Is it the time to tie the wedlock? In case you are not involved in an affair, then arranged marriage is undoubtedly the ultimate solution for you.The growing number of divorces post love marriages might leave you traumatized. You might ponder that when love marriages fail to become successful how nuptial bonds with strangers can stay happy forever? Your trauma is quite justified. But, arranged marriage can also become highly successful if you follow a few thumb rules. Have a sneak peak at the prima fascia of successful arranged marriage and make your wedlock a hit.
Overcome jitters of arranged marriage
The first vital thing that you have to keep in mind before deciding to opt for arranged marriage is your attitude. Marriage is a simple gamble. So, encouraging unnecessary thoughts that arranged marriage will inevitably be unsuccessful, is totally baseless. Get rid of such unnecessary jitters and encourage positive thoughts. Start believing that everything will happen for the good.
Allow some time before getting married
It is utmost important that you know the person clearly before you get married. Love marriages give the couples enough time to know each other. You too have to do the same in case of your arranged marriage. Getting in contact with a person one day and getting marrying the other day is nothing but foolishness. Even though your parents and close kith and kin might assure you that the mate that has been chosen for you is the perfect one; but be your own judge. This removes the chances of getting married to a complete stranger as you get some time to know your future and possibilities of getting a perfect match thereafter.
Clear your doubts and queries beforehand
It is just sheer foolishness to enter into a nuptial bond and cramp your head, that things did not fall in the right track. Therefore, we suggest that before the final commitment for marriage, have your queries cleared with your would-be spouse. In case, if you feel it is vital to inform him or her something serious that might affect your marital relationship later on, never hesitate to do so. Insist upon a transparent relationship to make your marriage work in a better form.
Respect your spouse
It is crucial that you have respect for your spouse. Since it is a new relationship that you have entered or will be entering into so you are required to create a strong bondage of love and care; respect is the first step towards it. Never make your spouse feel inferior. In case if there is a difference of opinion, sort it out politely. Quarreling and abusing your spouse in the initial days of marriage will widen the gap between each other rather than bringing you two closer.
Do not depend upon a via media
After getting married you might find it difficult to adjust with a particular habit of your spouse or wish to convey to him or her something. Never think that it is an indication of unsuccessful marriage. It is just a common phenomenon and such issues might arise after marriage. But never take the resort of a via media to convey something to your spouse. It becomes extremely embarrassing for him or her. Rather, talk to your spouse directly on any issue that is unsolved.
Insist upon regular communication
Unless you talk to each other regularly you are never going to built up a proper relationship, post arranged marriage. But when we ask you to talk, we do not indicate the mechanical dialogues like, “Dinner is ready”. “Good night”, “ I will be late today” types of stuffs. You should talk freely with your spouse on general issues, your personal life and things of such sort that give you more chances to interact freely with each other and know each other closely.
Do not have high expectations
The key to a successful arranged marriage is to abstain from high expectations. Since, you have already entered into wedlock, there is hardly any chance to fantasize and think how your wife or husband should be and your present spouse fails to live up to that expectation . Moreover, you are expected to have a preview of your would-be spouse during your courtship period. So, think of what you can do to make the relationship successful post marriage rather than expecting a lot from your spouse.
Get into a comfort zone
Marriage is not about getting into a legal relationship, being intimate in bed and extending the family. Arranged marriage is even more challenging to handle in this respect. Neither will you feel happy to sleep with an alien, nor will you like to call him or her your better half. So, we suggest you to enter into a comfort zone with your spouse before plunging into the other pleasures of married life. This phase of knowing each other closely post marriage will make both of you feel closer to each other.
Care for the smallest of needs
You cannot prioritize yourself and your needs only when you are involved in a martial tie. This will never indicate a successful marriage. There is no room for a selfish spouse in a booming matrimony. The same rule is at play, in case of arranged marriage too. The likes, dislikes and needs of your spouse needs equal priority. Let your spouse feel that you care for him or her too and value his or her preferences. Therefore, taking care of little things your spouse loves; or avoiding things he or she does not approve of, will be a great gesture to show your commitment towards the relationship. This will definitely strengthen your bond.
Do not force yourself to be loved
Whether you accept it or not, there isn’t any written rule that after entering into a wed lock your spouse is bound to love you. While relationships are created by us, we have hardly any control over our hearts, which is where love originates. Therefore, never try to force your spouse to love you or quarrel with him or her for feeling loveless. You must understand that your case is just the opposite of love marriage. Here, you marry first and then love each other. So, you need to give the relationship some time to grow in a natural manner. In the meantime, do not leave any stone unturned to win your spouse’s heart.